Of Coffee With A Chance Of Networking

38 Comments
blog comment thread

If you were having coffee with me, I would be very happy that you could make it back, (assuming you have been  here before that is). You know how you go to someone’s house and see the things being done that cannot make for things to be done and make you think “I am never coming back to your house again!!”

I am doing things that need to be done! So you see I am very happy that you dropped by, put your feet up and have a coffee and if coffee is not your poison you could try the water, water would definitely be your poison with the cholera outbreak you cant trust the water in your tap and now it seems you cant even trust the bottled water sold in the shops or even the borehole in your backyard unless you have it tested.

zimbabwe bottled water bombshell

Where were we? Oh yes, I recommend a hot beverage since boiling the water definitely kills gems, so does alcohol, I might have whiskey somewhere…. Suddenly I am thinking Irish Coffee. Yes? No? Maybe sprinkle everything with holy water and I read that you ought to be careful of germs from those bowls with holy water where everyone dips hands before getting into church, do people still do that? I haven’t been to church in ages but I still pray……..

If you were having coffee with me I would say surviving in this country of mine is an extreme sport, it should actually be a skill added to a CV. Living here makes you jack of all trades, if any of my posts are a barometer my CV would read

  1. Political analyst
  2. Financial expert
  3. Legal Expert
  4. Gender Equality Champion
  5. Chef and Handyman
  6. Travel trip advisor
  7. Digital Media Expert
  8. Geography, History and African Legends custodian
  9. Childcare specialist
  10. Fitness Trainer

And dont take my word for it;  lets see, whats a CV without refs:

  • Ntomby moyo says I am fave tweeps  (tweeps=twitter + peeps)
  • The Britchy says I deserve an award

If you were having coffee with me I would tell that I still surprised people put so much faith in people’s CV when searching for potential employees my CV might as well read as Graduate from the school of imaginary technology with honours in creative manipulation of reality.

If a whole minister of health has shall we say “made up” qualifications on his CV who am I to not strive for excellence on mine, I mean as long as I can deliver right? The First Rule in the hustler’s diary is dont get caught, and also always have an explanation and an exit plan….

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that, our free falling economy is quite the crazy roller coaster; the runaway rate of the United States Dollar versus our surrogate bond currency hit a crazy peak during the week then come crushing back again and who knows how it will be tomorrow, *sips tea*

Zimbollar Rate

I did say I am a financial expert right? Well the rate started going up after the minister of finance and the Reserve bank governor implemented some harsh economic reforms  which the President says are necessary bumps along the road to rebuilding the nation.

Sometime during the week announcements were made that another “Facility” might be backed by the Afreximbank (same bank which backed our surrogate bond currency)

and who knows what other arrangements those guys made (speculator) considering a quick look on their website shows our reserve bank governor is a Class B Director of said bank (Investigative Researcher and verifier of facts)

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that we launched a weekend blog comment thread, where Africa can meet the world I should update my CV to read Digital Community Builder ^_^

Afrobloggers Comment thread

Africa connected

It looks like I just made my blog a network zone, so after your visit please do drop a link to a post on your blog in the comments you think people must check out and I will come round to visit and also if you spot any interesting posts in my comments do check them out and also give them my regards so they know where you found their blog from because I have friends with good taste ^_^

~B

PS……. Also I remove unwanted people from pictures (Adds Creative Graphic designer to CV)

 

 

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38 Comments

    1. Hi Nigel The Eloquent!!!

      Thank you for the visit hahahaha I simply embraced one of the things I learnt about blogging, simply be yourself just like the way our voices are different so is the way we write.
      ~B

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      1. You surely are right on that one… Am not a fan of coffee but your coffee series are interesting…. I’ll be chilling on the side with a cocktail…. Hopefully those don’t have cholera too haha

        Liked by 1 person

  2. B! I don’t understand everything but I get it. To me this was wonderfully written. You get better and better. You’re growth is amazing, fantastic entertainer and I personally think you’re dope.

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    1. hahahaha no worries there is water purification meds in the water so its perfectly clean except for the slight chemical after taste that lingers at the back of your throat!!!! Cholera wont prosper here hahahahahha
      ~B

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  6. You take the creative cup any day! I can’t believe I just read newsworthy things that time I don’t even enjoy reading the paper. You laid it down really well and who would have known the rates were going to come crushing down. Fun times in Zimbabwe 🙂

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    1. Hahahahahahaha Thanks
      Confession, I absolutely hate the news I suppose cause its mostly doom and gloom.
      The rate is wildling!!!!!!
      fun times indeed
      ~B

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  7. An Irish coffee would do nicely B, thank you. So you basically have to drink nothing but alcohol now? That could prove…interesting.

    And your CV is most impressive! I’d hire you if I ran a media company, which I most assuredly do not. I’d make you my ambassador to Zimbabwe, as well as my chief political journalist. The best part is that in the US, you don’t need facts: you can just make your own! It’d be fun.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. hahahahaha I think there’s a name for that, when you conjure your facts as a magician would a rabbit out of a hat but never actually out on a hat…. alternative facts
      hey I should be like those tourism ambassador people I’ll have to look up how they select those
      ~B

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  8. Hey B-man. I stand with all the folks above. Your blog is one of the best I read. You manage to fill the spectrum between shocking and hilarious. You and I both should add “Purveyor of Irish Creams” to our CVs. Honestly though, politics frustrates me. Zimbabwe is in much more serious condition than the US to be sure, but I don’t think our country has ever been this polarized and radicalized within their position. I was amazed that Obama was not assassinated (and hope that my prayers for him helped) and I hated his presidency and could not wait for him to just go away, but now with Trump, I fear even more for his safety despite the fact that he has helped so many minorities with jobs. People are so nuts and I mostly blame our media who feed like piranhas on division and social unrest. Blaaa! I can’t even talk about this without feeling I need to take a shower afterwards. I appreciate and admire you for bringing your views to your blog. Stay healthy my friend and stop by any time for a real or virtual cup of something bug-free. You would always be welcome, but I may try to tempt you to try a story or two so we could laugh together. That too would be so welcome.

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    1. Thank you Gary
      I always appreciate your comments it rained yesterday and something happened to the powerlines its now day two without electricity and I am drinking coffeerish whiskey cheers……
      poiltics is hilarious if only bad policies didnt actually hurt the ordinary folk we would laugh and compare the follies of heads of state and the promises that stick to the bottom of their shoes
      have an awesome week
      ~B

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  9. Another amusing post and I also learn about all the issues in Zim at the same time! So sorry to hear about the cholera – a Zimbabwean colleague at work told me about that last week, and that the government want Zimbos living in SA to pay tax to Zim on their SA salaries! What? The mind boggles…
    Love your CV theme!

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. Hi Debs!!!!
      Thanks for the visit ^_^
      The things the government comes up with boggles the mind apparently the “home affairs” department wants to track all Zimbabweans in the diaspora and threaten them with revoking their passports if hey dont pay tax… I cant even lol
      Thanks apparently I am an expert if you need anything done if I cant do it, I might know a guy hahhaha
      ~B

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