Actually, if life gives you fruit, any fruit, you must be very careful of what is in the coffee or mango juice you have been drinking; because life is not in the habit of walking around giving people fruit; if its any consolation though, life has not been throwing rocks at you
So life give you mangoes…….
Peel and slice
Blend
Serve chilled
If you were having mango juice with me, I would ask you how old you were when you discovered, for yourself, that a computer hard-drive is nothing more than a shiny, disc…..
.….A super spinny disc turning round and round and every now and then it makes a ticking noise as it turns a little bit slower, turning round and round as your files disappear every now and then until it falls apart, what can I say its total crash of the hard drive
When your hard drive starts making the ticking sound of death, back up your data stat,
The Blue Screen Of Death
If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you that, according to a cabinet minister revelation, the Reserve Bank has paid for enough fuel supplies to to cover the next two years so the public should not panic
But given the track record of the state media and government, when they officially say one thing, one starts preparing for the opposite, dont panic they say…….
Meanwhile the president made a clarion for dialogue inviting the 20+ presidential candidates from the 2018 elections to discuss a framework for the way forward for the nation, but the two main contenders snubbed the meeting one citing that a photo opportunity is not dialogue and the word on the street is its like dip tank attendant inviting farmers who own no livestock ….
If the image in the Sunday Mail local paper can be believed then the austerity measures though bitter, are making country better……
If you were having coffee with me I would say hey, its the month of and Valentine’s in a few days, plans? no plans? why cant everyday be valentine or valentines’s for what, isnt that in honour of a beheading? you tell me
Have an awesome one and happy heart week ♥♥♥♥
If you were having coffee with me, well we woudnt be having coffee we would be trying out some freshly blended mango juice….
Good thing there’s mango trees in the backyard otherwise I would be unable to offer you much else, have a mango and wash it down with juice
It’s been a traumatic week, strange how only last Sunday was calm but deceptively more like the calm before a storm; as the country burned the next day, following protests that turned violent and an even deadlier response by security forces that has left a bloody tally of death, destruction and ruthless victmisation.
Zimbabwe Human Rights Forum say since the National Shutdown began on 14th January they have recorded: 844 human rights violations 12 deaths 78 injuries caused by gunshots 466 arrests#Zimshutdown#ZimbabweShutdownpic.twitter.com/1nokPXwEuR
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you about the internet shutdown that resulted from a directive from the government to Internet Service providers ostensibly as security measure to stop protestors who were co-ordinating via social media and the internet but under whose cover, a violent crackdown of suspected protest instigators was carried out.
The way the internet was shutdown you would think they did not realise it’s is a whole eco-system and switching it off not only disrupts the digital economy but denies people access to affordable communication and stifles freedom of expression or maybe they do and it scares them, to quote Game of thrones
“When you tear out a man’s tongue, you are not proving him a liar, you’re only telling the world that you fear what he might say.”
Tyrion Lannister; Game Of Thrones
If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you that the way the internet has been switched on and off in the past week is reminiscent of a toddler discovering the power button on the remote control and keeps pressing it, you would they found a new toy.
This shutting down of the internet seems to be the new trend, as governments figure out that if you cant control it, shut it down.
“It is not even the second month of the new year and we have had significant internet shutdowns in four African countries,”
Berhan Taye, who leads the #KeepItOn campaign for global digital rights group Access Now.
I used to think my government would never do that but nope I was wrong, as Zimbabwe joined the list with the DRC, Gabon and Sudan. They read from the same Book Of Tricksit seems from contested elections to violent crackdown of opposition its not unique to one country.
At least for now the internet has been restored after a second black but partially (again) with limitations to social media sites who knows for how long?
internet restoration after shut down
I can predict its going to be tough for internet dependent enterprises when parliament finalises the Cyber Security Bill to minimize threat that is the internet; who knows maybe they will even throw in stringent licensing and registrations requirements like they tried to do for bloggers in Tanzania and all sorts taxes along the lines of Uganda’s social media tax…
Oh no! Maybe I am giving them ideas right now!!…….
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that during a joint press conference of the police and army a statement was issued that basically blamed what happened in the past week as being perpetrated by army deserters, and wait for it rouge elements who stole army uniforms and were masquerading as security forces but how does it explain them having standard issue military guns or using state vehicles, its all very confusing cause earlier they had blamed labour movements, civic organisations and the opposition and for the second time again #ThisFlag movement charged with trying to subvert a constitutionally elected government…
The Zimbabwe Republic Police and Zimbabwe National Army held a joint press conference tonight about the violence of the past weeks. They blame criminals, retired or fake soldiers / police committing offenses in uniforms or regalia. pic.twitter.com/2t3hhxtQKb
Looks like we should brace ourselves for more raids as they try to flush out the rogue elements and probably more internet disruptions, unless an appeal to the constitutional court set for Monday accomplishes anything but I have long since lost faith in the ability of the judiciary to uphold the constitution, waiting for them to surprise and as for people trying to reach out to SADC and the AU, did you know Zimbabwe’s president is the incoming Deputy Chairperson of the SADC Organ on Politics, Defence and Security
If you were having coffee with me, we would be having mango juice I think it tastes great though somewhat pulp
Are you staying up to watch the blood moon tonight ? I would not miss it for the world, the moon and I have an arrangement, wherever you are looking at the moon know I will be looking at the same moon too
Imagine waking up on the morning of the third day of a mass protest to shut down the country thats turned violent; there’s a message from your service Mobile Network Operator telling you that they have been directed to switch off the internet.
You arent really surprised, because it explains how you failed to reach anyone when you spent the past day trying to contact friends, family and others to see if they safe amidst tales of the heavy handed response by the security forces to the protesters and rumours of horror abductions in the middle of the night…..
Zimbabweans who use Econet mobile network provider woke up to this text message in their inbox:
No doubt the government is pawning off social media and the internet for being used to incite violence and rally protesters by unscrupulous agents bent on causing alarm, disorder and tarnish the country’s image at time the president is abroad, trying to woo investors to Zimbabwe and decided we needed time out ….. from the internet.
Initially, there had been restriction to access on social media sites, namely Facebook, Twitter and the instant messenger platform Whatsapp but someone must have pointed out the futility of such a move as various VPN methods people were being circulated; informing the public on what to do in the event of an internet block and they decided to go the ultimate route of shutting all internet access in Zimbabwe.
Instantly taking us back, years back, in technological advancement, back to the dark ages with the only means of communication being phone calls and sending good old fashioned texts like its 2008 and we haven’t been introduced to basic GPRS packet data service.
Emails weren’t working, online transactions weren’t going through and remember, we live in a cashless economy courtesy of the crippling cash shortages and mobile banking not working because, hello internet……
I feel so blind without the internet, it has come to become an integral part of my existence, I am a digital storyteller after all and the internet is my eyes, ears and at times it’s the cricket on my shoulder on the place where my watchdog should be.
The void that separates us, the internet fills it up, making a bridge imagine, if that bridge just disappears, leaving us in isolated islands of solitude not knowing the welfare of anyone else but yours…..
Our constitution clearly states:
61. Freedom of expression and freedom of media
1. Every person has the right to freedom of expression, which includes— (a) Freedom to seek, receive and communicate ideas and other information; (b) Freedom of artistic expression and scientific research and creativity (c) Academic freedom
>
> 5. Freedom of expression and freedom of the media do not include— (a) Incitement to violence (b) Advocacy of hatred or hate speech (c) Malicious injury to a person’s dignity or (d) Malicious or unwarranted of a person’s right to privacy
The government’s shutting down of the internet for everyone indiscriminately, walks is lowkey infringes upon the right to freedom of expression.
Yes, granted misguided elements might have used it to spread inflammatory messages on the social media spaces but would that warrant a total internet shutdown?
If yes, does that mean we should shut down all communications too, if its deemed people are communicating with each other, plotting to protest? How about even declaring everyone walk around with a muzzle and not speaking because some words which come out of people’s mouths would push people to episodes of violence……. where do we draw the line
…….and once they realise they can get away with shutting down the internet, all the atrocities and human right violations they can get away with under the cover of an internet blackout;
“Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth.”
If you were having coffee with me I would ask you if you knew that a shadow appears something is in the way of light, before you answered quickly yes you knew that; I would stop you and say you think you know but have you really thought about it, a flame casts no shadow……
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that these are type of conversations we had in a fuel queue, to pass time during the over 3 hour wait in a fuel queue to get petrol.
I have heard people joke that Zimbabwe might be in the Guinness Book Of Records for having the longest fuel queue, well it might not be a true fact but we have had some pretty crazy fuel queues.
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that we stuck it through with a very long fuel queue because word on the streets was that effective midnight (13 January) the fuel price would go up and true to the word the president was on national TV announcing that fuel was going to go up by over 100% from about $1.50; Petrol now cost $3.31 per litre and diesel $3.11
Even though the president assured the nation that the prices for everything else would remain the same, you wont need to be an economic analyst to predict the domino effect; how the fuel price hike will probably trigger an increase in transport driven services and by extension an increase in the prices for services as everyone simply passes on the cost along their chain and pretty much everything else will go up too; even things that are not affected directly by the fuel price increase will rise courtesy of an entrepreneur trying to cushion themselves from the rising consumer bucket.
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that the civil servants sector in the past week refused a proposed 10% pay increase by the government. With the least paid government employee earning about $400 then that would translate to a $40 pay increase which would barely cover anything especially now in light of the 100+% fuel price increase. Its interesting noting how different newspapers phrased the headlines for the civil servant pay increase.
If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you that now looks like a good time to start looking into ways of alternative transport or even alternative fuels for vehicles, we have a tremendous amount of sunshine this side of the world, yet I have never seen a solar powered vehicle, where are all these genius ideas and concepts…..Maybe I should have a chat with Elon Musk if you know how I can contact him please holla at me.
If you were having
coffee with me I would tell you I am grateful that once you learn how to ride a
bicycle you can never forget because looks like a bicycle might just become my
preferred economic mode of transportation
“A bicycle is curious vehicle. Its passenger is its engine.”
John Howard
What’s going on in your neck of the woods? Here’s to an awesome week ahead
~B
PS would the price of internet access be affected by a rise in the fuel price, it shouldn’t right?…..
If you were having coffee with me, I would ask you if there is a standard number of days into the year, in which it would still be acceptable to wish someone a HAPPY NEW YEAR.
Here is a clip of my dreadful brothers and welcoming you to a 2019.
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that on New Year’s Eve we did the thing we do every year and sang the sun up into the New Year.
Because the New Year’s sun wont rise until we sing it up…..
We are seven days into the New Year and it doesn’t feel that new; feels pretty much like the last one but older and starting off like a video game cranked up to the hardest difficulty level.
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that January is usually known as an austere month after having overspend during the holiday season resulting in the dreaded January Disease.
Compound this with a runaway economy were prices can go up by +300% from the last time you checked but strangely enough people’s salaries (for those fortunate enough to be employed) remain the same; corporates seem to be looking out for number one and the government seems to be only good at making promises, threats and compromises.
Earlier in the past week a local beverages firm, Delta Beverages released a communication about changing their pricing to accept only hard currency and not the surrogate bond currency or local electronic transfers as they needed to source forex to pay for imported supplies.
The long arm of the government was prompt to point out “the error” of their ways on how such a move ran counter productve to the multi-currency economy that the country runs and how if they were facing challenges, they should have honoured their social contract first and approached relevant stakeholders first instead of just making public announcements (that unsettle and confuse the citizens)
If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you that the government seems to have “difficulties” coming to an understanding with the striking doctors but find it curious that it had to take over a month before any sort of progress had been made yet they resolved the Delta Corporation case within 24 hours one wonders about priorities…..
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you growing up one of the things I hated the most were those back to school adverts especially at the beginning of the year reminding you that the holidays are over and its time to learn…….
Sending kids to school is also quite the hustle with the way the pricing of school uniforms an fees is set up and all the accessories that go with, and it doesn’t help that some schools only accept uniforms from the accredited suppliers (read that as the more expensive ones like its some sort of cartel)
If you are having coffee with me, I would tell you, it also looks like school teachers are also gearing up to start a strike of their own maybe schools wont even open on schedule….
But hey in a country with 10% formal employment everyone is a hustler and entrepreneurs will tell you that while you only see difficulties they are seeing opportunities and raking it in; sometimes I think the whole country has misplaced priorities, look out for number one seems the order of the day..
Compliments of the New year;
feeling the warmth of the New Year’s sun
behind closed eyelids,
dreaming of brighter days……..
Have an awesome week and year and thanks for dropping by……… and get back to whatever it is you do during the year when not holidaying!!!
If you were having coffee with me I would greet you very merrily and say “compliments of the festive season” as I ask how your holiday season has been.
If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you its the eveof the eve of New Year’s eve and I practically woke up in a fuel queue.
Curious fact: how old where you, when you realised that the eve in lets say New Year’s eve did not necessarily mean evening but the whole day before an important event/date……
If you having coffee with me, I would tell you that fuel, particularly of the petrol(gasoline) variety has been in short supply; in fact, a whole lot of commodities have practically been scarce,as the economy runs on fumes.
This festive season hasn’t had much in the way of festivities, when you cant even find a soft drink. Imagine it a Christmas without Coca-cola, its the signature holiday refreshment, almost seems as if the coca-cola company single-handedly created Santa.
I picture Santa Claus; after a hard day riding his sleigh, delivering gifts to the good kids drinks Coca-Cola and now you cant help but imagine that either……
The Christmas lights might have been turned on but there isn’t much of any cheer
If you were having coffee with me, would you believe it, if I told you that we queued up at Fuel Service station, “on a rumour” that a fuel tanker might eventually deliver a load of fuel.
Random strangers would drive by and ask if we had heard any “official” tip off and we would laugh as we told them we had nowhere better to queue up….. “so here we are.”
Funny enough people came and joined up in right behind us
and some sneaky few, even silently asked themselves if they could join up in front of us too …
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that you know the struggle is real when you learn to read “the code” written on the fuel tanker trucks and you can tell which one is petrol(gasoline); diesel; Liquified Petroluem Gas(LPG) and paraffin (kerosene)
\
Paraffin
Well the fuel delivery eventually arrived but just in time for service station to close at 7pm sharp and our car was locked in the queue, so we had no choice but leave it there…
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you its difficult to get a good night’s sleep when you keep wondering if the car you left by itself is safe. What if a someone steals it? Well, at least they cant drive it far, since it doesn’t have fuel ha!
Anyhoo the car was there in the morning, in exactly the same state we left it whoop whoop and I pa
You know things are a bad when people congratulate you on getting petrol in your car, because it’s an actual mission, requiring certain level of persistence, faith and a dash cold hard stubbornness as you defend your position in the queue..… If you were having coffee with me I would ask you if you think getting fuel is an ordeal then do not fall sick in this country because getting medical treatment is could be a literal life and death ordeal.
The cost of medication and medical procedures is staggeringly high and finding yourself in a govern/ment hospital with nothing but faith and prayer because doctors are on strike (demanding they get their salary in United States Dollars because the local surrogate currency, the bond is losing value by the day even though the governments insists its 1:1 with the USD) can really humble you.
Anyhoo the government, being as it is, deemed it best to unilaterally issue an ultimatum that all striking doctors go back to work or be on immediate suspension, well they didn’t go back to work and here we are and here we are, a nation without doctors
whatever you don’t try not fall ill or injure yourself stay healthy you life depends on it If you were having coffee with me and ou were wondering how our free fall economy is doing as we close the year, well here’s fun informative snippet from a cartoon the captures the doom and gloom in a way that does not cause too much alarm and despondency
here is a fun catchy song which totally captures how the economy is currently perfoming ……. I totally felt this!!!!!! pic.twitter.com/Lm4XbiGbjG
But hey we still sat down together as a family this holiday season and once again my mum managed to feed us a miracle since nobody knows how she got Christmas dinner done and that is why we say Grace before every meal, to bless the hands that put food on the table.
My name is Beaton but you call me B. I am a digital storyteller, which basically means that I use the medium of the internet to immortalize myself the only way I know how by WRITING.
When I am not writing I am builder of blogging communities running an online platform that serves to bring together and network bloggers from all over Africa, where the world meets Africa as we like to call it.
The Blogging Culture:A Website means community
I am blogger although technically when no one is around, I call myself a writer with a blog. But what is a blog anyway?
To answer this I will have to delve into a brief history of blogging and WordPress
Blog comes the word WebLog which means literally a log of the web
Blogging started in the developed countries, around the mid to late 90s, when it was mostly online diaries…… By early 2000s blogging had become, A THING a movement even a full time business for some, not just endorsing products and affiliate marketing but marketing and selling their own skills services and crafts as diverse niches of blogs mushroomed.
It no longer was about just personal diaries, but lifestyle, fashion, health fitness, travel, tourism, parenting; the list is endless there’s a type of blogger for everything somewhere on the internet; even those who blog about blogging.
Here’s a fun fact……Did you know WordPress was built and evolved from a blogging platform called B2/CafeLog which had gained quite a huge community count up until the programmer created of the platform vanished leaving a sizeable community who no longer had developer support.
An innovative user of this platform worried about this development came up with the idea to create anew platform integrating the “cool stuff” from there and adding more features and May 2003 WordPress was born
15 years later here we are:
What does this mean? There’s a huge community of bloggers and its growing and so too has the definition of what blogging is; blogging has no longer has a clear cut simple definition, it means different things to different people.
The official definition of blogging goes something like this:
a website whose posts listed chronologically from most recent to oldest updated regularly usually by one author
I can attempt to summarily define it as: The online updating of content onto a digital platform
Something as simple as posting a status onto your Instagram, sharing a note on your Facebook, tweeting a tweet or even a video on YouTube or updating the content on your website; blogging is a little like running a magazine.
Blogging has transcended simply being just something you do on the internet; its more than just a marketing tool too; its also a political tool, an awareness campaign raiser, a society watchdog and even custodian of culture. A blog is like a key that opens doors to worlds one can only dream and tap into the community of people beyond the person simply on the end of the screen
Redwoods trees grow to dizzying heights reaching for the sky and last for thousands of years yet they have very shallow roots
How Do They Do This
The secret to their strength is that their roots … intertwine with other redwoods to create an underground network of powerful connections.
I have kept my personal blog for about five years now and my reach stats look like this
I did a little research via my peers in the blogging community to see if anyone had any ideas why the blogging culture in the global south is so low and the most common reasons were as follows:
The Cost of data is very prohibitive Alliance for Affordable Internet (A4AI) released a report in October showing that on average 1GB of data costs 2.5% of the average monthly income; this translates to over two billion people living in a country where 1GB of mobile data is unaffordable… and bundled internet packages make the net be largely regarded as a just social media since all people do is mostly go onto social media
As for people not understanding the blogging culture, that’s part of why I am always encouraging and helping out fellow content creators and building blogging communities it seems like fun but a lot of work goes into having a website and when you put effort and get nothing back that why websites die……
How to support bloggers
Number One Read our work
Subscribe, like, comment If you read and love something or find it useful say so
If a product is being sold or reviewed why not buy or recommend to a friend
Share links with your friends
If you spot any errors hit the contact tab let us know
And Pay US ha!
Remember Archimedes’ famous quote; that give me a fulcrum, along enough lever and a place to stand on and I will change the world
I say to you:
Give me a blog, an audience and an internet connection, and I will move the world.
~Beaton
Thank you!!
~B
PS And while I have you here, I am part of blogging community that picks a weekly blogger to crush on, I am this week’s Blog Crush but you dont have to take my word for how A Blog means community have a quick read at these posts:
If you were having coffee with me I would be pleased that you dropped by, have a sit go ahead put your feet up. I can offer you coffee, but it doesn’t have sugar apparently that’s how a real coffee drinker has theirs, no sugar no milk. I ran out of sugar and cant find it at the shops, besides who needs sugar when the pleasure of your company is sweet enough.
If you were having coffee with me I would ask something asked in group chat;
“After how many visits, to your house can a visitor sit back and put their feet up on your sofas?”
Never maybe? Well if you visit me, be comfy, drape yourself on the couch like you have a right to be there.
If you were having coffee with me I would inquire if you ever tried crocodile meat? If you haven’t what would do you think you have eaten other people would consider weird?
Crocodile has become quite my regular dinner guest as the main course, of course. For some reason its super cheap where you can find it. I don’t know why its so cheap I remember the first time I tasted crocodile I was about 10 years old at a crocodile farm in Chiredzi; in the Lowveld region of Zimbabwe. I wouldn’t remember the prices but I am sure it was treated as a delicacy with a fancy name like the fisherman’s platter
Well in this crazy economy its now the affordable option unless of course you fancy these chicken bones going round on social media
someone tell me this is a joke
#NemamiriroAkaitaZvinhu I always say grace before I eat because every meal is a story of a hustle, the salt on the table, the oil that fried the veggies and if i'm lucky to have meat issa miracle, never knowing what my next meal will be.
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that I was planning on travelling to go visit my mum; then I heard of a horrific accident involving two buses which resulted in the death of over 40 people and now I have a fear of travelling; sometimes we forget the little miracles that we take for granted, every time we safely reach where we are going.
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you there’s also other things I wanted to say but the loss of so many lives, puts a dampener on things. Allow me to share this solidarity image:
pass the flame on
On that somber tip I will have to bid you good day, have a blessed week and remember live your life to fullest
~B
PS and yeah if this is you first time bumping into these pages of mine hey why not share a link to your site and I promise to get back to you and if you see any shared links do check them out
If you were having coffee with me, I would be very happy that you are here to keep me company because the power utility company is carrying out critical maintenance works so there wont be electricity in most of the city for the next twelve hours, at least they warned us in advance even though I still could not manage to buy fuel for the generator but that’s a long queue of a story, anyway I am so glad you are here.
I hope you aren’t really expecting to have coffee because well there’s no electricity and also we just ran out of LP gas for the cooker and its become very hard to refill the gas canisters; like everything else you have to stand in a long winding queue, which you are not guaranteed wont run out before your turn or opt to buy from suppliers who charge at triple the price but then that just reduces the cost effectiveness of using a gas cooker and might as well as use an electric one because in comparison the electricity bill is less shocking….
If you are having coffee with me I can only offer you lukewarm water but I can guarantee you its safe, I measured out the water purification tablets myself. I haven’t heard any news on the cholera outbreak that broke out over a month ago so I presume it’s now effectively contained but still that doesn’t mean one must slack on hygienic vigil have you washed your hands? Even if its to just drink water with me.
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that I have been thinking a lot on an unpopular opinion a journalist tweeted:
#Zimbabwe like other African countries, locals complain and fail to see the bigger picture, opportunities, outsiders are teaming up with other Zimbabweans legally and making loads of cash, we need to get out of our poverty mentality as black people, benefit from our resources
My first reaction was to find it insensitive and highly offensive given the challenges we constantly face in an economy that runs practically on fumes and speculation and a government that doesn’t quite seem to be in control yet tells us that the country is fine, that social media and fake news mongers are responsible for the shortages, resulting in people panic buying and the crippling inflation caused by unscrupulous business operators out to make a quick buck,……
I felt like what she was saying boils down to all the struggles I face are all in my mind, that I am poor because I think like a poor person and it did not help matters when she also made the following tweet about those who left the country to find economic asylum in foreign lands at the risk of being second class citizens…
So working 3 manual labour jobs in the UK is betterthan staying in africa … ok,
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you I looked up the phrase Poverty Mentality on the internet and it’s a term used by motivational coaches to describe the state of mind where one is focused on the things they lack, that no matter how hard they work, they will always lack and end up blaming the system for never giving them a break.
Zig Ziglar characterized poverty mentality as
Constant fixation on money or the lack of it
An anti rich people attitude
Fear-based decision making
The only way to break out of it is break out of it and really succeed you have to make a conscious choice to do so, be proactive, use what you have— believe in yourself, have a plan, and go get it.
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that this great advice on entrepreneurship but you cant have a nation where everyone is forced to be one out of necessity or risk starving someone, what I think we need is an ecosystem where people can focus on what they are good at and love to do than just where is the money and what solution can I do to come up with it.
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that in the world of hip hop; rapper 50cent and Ja Rule have a long standing feud thats old enough to vote (maybe its one of those manufactured publicity stunts to get hype going like most beefs usually are case in point I did not know Ja Rule was having a concert)
50cent posted on instagram that he bought 200 seats in the front so they can be empty
photoshopped impression of what it would like
Well, I wanted to crown him as the King of Pettiness but I don’t want to seem like I am hating because I wish I could afford to be that rich but hey if I was Ja Rule I would be laughing all the way to the bank thats $3000 *sips lukewarm water*
Maybe we should be enterprising entrepreneurs like prophet Magaya who today who made an announcement that after a revelation from God he has found a 100% organic and”scientifically proven” cure for HIV and AIDS the aguma plant and working with Indian pharmaceutical experts to form Aretha medical
Here’s to an awesome week
~B
PS yeah because if you randomly ended upon on this post please do say hello and lets connect; even drop a link to the post you think I should check out and if you see any interesting links in the comments do check them out cause we roll with awesome company
If you were having coffee with me, I would be very happy that you could make it back, (assuming you have been here before that is). You know how you go to someone’s house and see the things being done that cannot make for things to be done and make you think “I am never coming back to your house again!!”
I am doing things that need to be done! So you see I am very happy that you dropped by, put your feet up and have a coffee and if coffee is not your poison you could try the water, water would definitely be your poison with the cholera outbreak you cant trust the water in your tap and now it seems you cant even trust the bottled water sold in the shops or even the borehole in your backyard unless you have it tested.
Where were we? Oh yes, I recommend a hot beverage since boiling the water definitely kills gems, so does alcohol, I might have whiskey somewhere…. Suddenly I am thinking Irish Coffee. Yes? No? Maybe sprinkle everything with holy water and I read that you ought to be careful of germs from those bowls with holy water where everyone dips hands before getting into church, do people still do that? I haven’t been to church in ages but I still pray……..
If you were having coffee with me I would say surviving in this country of mine is an extreme sport, it should actually be a skill added to a CV. Living here makes you jack of all trades, if any of my posts are a barometer my CV would read
If you were having coffee with me I would tell that I still surprised people put so much faith in people’s CV when searching for potential employees my CV might as well read as Graduate from the school of imaginary technology with honours in creative manipulation of reality.
If a whole minister of health has shall we say “made up” qualifications on his CV who am I to not strive for excellence on mine, I mean as long as I can deliver right? The First Rule in the hustler’s diary is dont get caught, and also always have an explanation and an exit plan….
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that, our free falling economy is quite the crazy roller coaster; the runaway rate of the United States Dollar versus our surrogate bond currency hit a crazy peak during the week then come crushing back again and who knows how it will be tomorrow, *sips tea*
I did say I am a financial expert right? Well the rate started going up after the minister of finance and the Reserve bank governor implemented some harsh economic reforms which the President says are necessary bumps along the road to rebuilding the nation.
"The only way to a stronger economy is to restructure, rebuild and reform"
Sometime during the week announcements were made that another “Facility” might be backed by the Afreximbank (same bank which backed our surrogate bond currency)
Today in Bali, Indonesia at the IMF/World Bank Meetings, I had fruitful discussions with the President of Afreximbank Dr Oramah. Afreximbank has offered Zimbabwe a facility to guarantee 1:1 Convertibility of RTGS balances into US$ and availability of US$ for Nostro FCAs. pic.twitter.com/ArlqdQoOyG
and who knows what other arrangements those guys made (speculator) considering a quick look on their website shows our reserve bank governor is a Class B Director of said bank (Investigative Researcher and verifier of facts)
If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that we launched a weekend blog comment thread, where Africa can meet the world I should update my CV to read Digital Community Builder ^_^
Afrobloggers Weekend Comment Thread *Drop a link to a post including a brief description of the article. *Dont just drop link & run: see other links shared and visit the blogs read AND COMMENT ****ALSO reply to the tweet whose blog you commented on and tag #AbWCT so we know!! ~B pic.twitter.com/CTC1b0bmwp
It looks like I just made my blog a network zone, so after your visit please do drop a link to a post on your blog in the comments you think people must check out and I will come round to visit and also if you spot any interesting posts in my comments do check them out and also give them my regards so they know where you found their blog from because I have friends with good taste ^_^
~B
PS……. Also I remove unwanted people from pictures (Adds Creative Graphic designer to CV)
