Of Coffee And The Untimely Visitor

If you were having coffee with me, I would say it is a pleasure having you here. I may not tell you enough or at all that when you drop by for a visit and we chat; sometimes you say a word or two sometimes I do all the talking; I appreciate you.

One must always let people know how much they are appreciated because…. Life has a funny way of unravelling even the best laid out plans. That’s life, It Happens and it goes on……

God’s a connoisseur of fragile things and decorates His cloudy outlook with ornaments of finest glass

—Dr Sleep, Stephen King

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that I have just come back from my friend’s funeral. It is hard to bury a friend, but even harder to watch a parent bury their child. A parent’s grief is heartbreaking.

My friend was one of those outgoing people who easily made friends with people and so the funeral was well-attended; considering burial was at an out of the way farm they recently resettled to. Getting there was quite the adventure, since we didn’t know the directions and the driver and conductor of the bus we took; had never heard of the bus stop we would get off….

By a stroke of luck strangers also in the bus, going somewhere else, happened to overhear our conversation and knew my late friend’s family; they weren’t going to the funeral, hadn’t even heard of the death. They gave us directions, of where to and how we would walk when we got off the bus. We left them quite distraught that they couldn’t come with us and asked us to pay respect on their behalf.

If I learnt anything, it’s that things have a way of working out, our life is littered with many coincidences, maybe its fate, destiny, karma or simply The Lord’s mysterious ways.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that my friend used to joke that they would rather have a party at their funeral and liquor to poured on their graves than have tears shed for them. So we had a colourful send off as we paid our last respects. If it wasn’t for the coffin sticking out as a stark reminder of the untimely visitor who waits for each of us at the end of our path….one would not have been faulted for thinking people were singing and dancing at a party. A few feathers might have been ruffled as the older generation felt the younger generation was hijacking tradition and turning what’s supposed to be a somber affair, into a circus and that the liquor might have been flowing a little too freely, but all in all I think everything worked out; it usually does.

If you were having coffee with me, I would tell you that I was shocked to learn of the death of Chester Bennington from the Linkin Park Band. I heard the news in a car I got a lift from; coming from my friend’s burial, death never takes a vacation….

I have been a huge Linkin Park from when I listened to their debut album Hybrid Theory almost 17 years ago; and it was an escape and an outlet for all the words inside I had never said, and now, now I write.

Chester Bennington’s death was a suicidal hanging after battling addiction and depression. Mental health awareness is something that must be spread people, are out there fighting a darkness within and no one ever realises it; not until its too late.

Once upon a time I wrote this: Of The Strong Silent Man

Linkin Park has launched a tribute website Chester.linkinpark.com with links to help you; In case you or someone you know needs support…

If you are in Zimbabwe Click here to  see a post with local places you can find free support and counselling

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that you must always be reaching out to your friends because you never know, a simple “hello; how are you doing…” could save a life.

~B

PS The first thing I did when I got home was to check my garden I have gone for a couple of days and I kept wondering how the plants in my garden were doing since I wasn’t there to  water them…. I guess they are growing on me…

Photocredit: chester.linkinpark  Dj Khaled