Of Coffee With Bad Cops Good Cop

If you were having coffee with me I would be glad to have you visit and tell you have I got the tea for you. In an old post, I once joked about having coffee with the police… well, news flash, our police service don’t serve coffee or any other beverages for that matter, so, I was a guest of the state for a couple of hours I do not recommend.

My day started pretty ordinary, I had plans and people to see, I mean seriously, would anyone get into town for no reason, even if they have eased the COVID restrictions. So, there I was sitting on a park bench in Harare’s first street waiting for an appointment, drinking my water which may or may not have been laced with vodka, for medicinal purposes, of course.

If you were having coffee with I would tell you that I had been contemplating the complete lack in unease of getting into town, as a fellow blogger Titus_Ruku commented on my previous post Of Coffee With Grass vs The People; if you don’t have your own car you better have a fat wallet when you go into town.

waiting for transport to town

It’s a logistical nightmare, you wait by the roadside and hope a fellow motorist will give you a lift and that they will charge you a reasonable fee, while also keeping your fingers crossed that they don’t have any nefarious intentions. If you get into a pirate taxi then be prepared to brace for some reckless driving as they do evasive manoeuvres to counter the police and of course, you cant see anything from the boarded-up windows.

boarded up combi

So, there I was, park bench, thinking about all the “incidences” from my forays into town the past week; when a company of police officers descend on me, saying that I am under arrest for not wearing a mask correctly. I tried to explain that I was drinking water, alone, on a park bench but of course the constables took it as a challenge to their authority going on a rant of how I had been sitting there for over half an hour with my mask down and put handcuffs on me for resisting arrest.

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you maybe I would have protested further if my water was 100% Pure Water which it may or may not have been. I figured let me be a law-abiding citizen and go pay my fine for not wearing a mask which was the equivalent of $2 or so, its not even that much and bore the humiliation of having handcuffs on my hands for the first time ever in my life.

One officer who was helping me navigate past potholes and traffic on account of my difficulties in walking with hands cuffed behind my back then kindly offered they could remove my handcuffs, but I would have to give them my phone as a surety that I would not try any funny business like running away. It was an easy enough choice to make, I didn’t even think about it, gave them my phone and my handcuffs were removed…

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you that I was perfectly civil and didn’t even ask the police officers how come their masks weren’t covering their noses as well and I walked leisurely behind them watching them chase after people not properly wearing their masks. At the Central Police Station we were all herded into a parking lot shade and kept there, till it was one’s turn to pay the fine.

ZRP Central Police station shade car park

The process was surprisingly very complicated or may be they just want to punish you extra so you never want to be arrested. I got arrested at around 10 am and only managed to pay my fine at 6pm and and through out this time was just packed in the parking lot…  One officer made a grand speech about how this was their domain and they could keep us detained for upto 48 hours without needing to explain why they had us detained…

(I was even wondering if anyone would know what happened to me and this a few days after the 6th year anniversary of the disappearance of Itai Dzamara) One fellow arrested person who tried to take a video of the police officer, was told if they cant prove they are a journalist then they would be in really big trouble for recording police officers at work.

Occasionally a name would be called to go and pay the fine and you would be expected to know the name, rank and force number of your arresting officer… Hello, how would you know all that? Those who had connections or probably paid some sort of bribe got released faster while the rest of us just languished there for hours and hours…

sitting cross legged at police station

The somewhat sympathetic police officer seemed surprised to see I was still at the police just as they were about to end their shift and finally said I could pay my fine… And by the way, the the fine money is 200 Bond cash and not Ecocash and you cant use a card to swipe for payment after 4pm; oh and they don’t accept United States Dollars, fun stuff… There’s a business opportunity for an entrepreneur who wants to provide people with bond notes to pay police fines.

If I get COVID I know where I got it, at the police station packed with hundreds of other people….

If you were having coffee with me I would tell you schools are supposed to open starting tomorrow Monday the 15th with exam classes, even though some teachers are said to be refusing the 25% pay hike and set to start an industrial call of incapacitation.

 Meanwhile, as our covid vaccine campaign continues, police have arrested more people than have been vaccinated, (maybe they should just turn police stations into vaccination centres); the president of Tanzania is said to have COVID and being treated in Kenya by unconfirmed sources; which would be ironic after he declared that there was no COVID in Tanzania and refused to have vaccination programmes…

If your week was going terribly, I would say at least you are not these guys in Warri Delta State, Nigeria who caught a Blue Marlin fish worth 2,6 million and simply killed and ate it…

Blue Marlin Fish Nigeria

Whats going on in your neck of the woods?


PS Miss Good Cop made a follow up phonecall to see if I arrived home ok, the police can be so friendly when they want to be.



  1. Oh so u had a face mask, they’re clearly just bored and looking to ruin people’s day. 🤦‍♀️ Ugh. I HOPE they have some things better to do than this?? So ridiculous those cops are.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It does not even make sense
      …. And instead of helping curb the spread of Covid their systems seem to just be a super spreader


  2. What a day- what a day. Oh my fara God. Africa is very dark and monstrous. I am just baffled with our living conditions. Black on black hate, humiliation, torture has become a norm. This thing happening in Zim, is unacceptable but it’s happening and the black government is okay with it. I doubt Africans have a democracy; and year 2020-2021 is proof enough. Look at South Africa

    Liked by 1 person

  3. 😂😂😂😂 The 1s from Nigeria- I say to them; nilahle amadlozi…(the ancestors turned their backs on you guys, sorry🤣🤣🤣😅)

    Liked by 1 person

  4. geez…That sounds awful. Ya back in ’89 I was trying to prevent my girlfriend from jumping off a bridge, so what happens…Vice cops approach me with guns drawn…Yelling at me to get on the ground…Worst memory of my life with cops

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Yeah I wasn’t arrested, I was just a long haired ripped jeans 19 yr old telling the truth, they took her to the hospital to be evaluated and I had to fetch her Mom who I didn’t get along with,who worked third shift and was asleep. So that was equally as awful. But yeah, crazy three year relationship I had with that girl.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Hi Matt
        sure thing, absolutely you can read it on the podcast, there is also something from my archives that totally needs a reading will dig it up and shake off the dust

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you D yeah it so wasn’t a fun week but we can laugh about it and keep it moving 😂
      Thanks for visiting, much appreciated.
      Have an awesome week

      Liked by 1 person

  5. But but but I would like to ask Do they know who you are?

    Okay clearly the police are grappling for more power than they are given because who will you report to anyway.
    In Uganda when you see police ,have money or run away they are equal to the thieves we seemingly Run from.

    Oh meanwhile am so sorry you had to even go through that it doesn’t make sense at all ah ah ah ….

    So why is town restricted again??

    In Uganda honestly am not sure what is happening I have avoided news all week just to keep my heart at peace somehow .

    Even j need some weeks rest from bad news ..

    PS: It’s still very hot here

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Obviously they didnt know who I was…. hahahahhaah I imagine if they did they might have kept me longer too I mean the way they threatened this one guy who was taking pictures put the fear into me like ok keep you head low and your mouth shut and pay yur fine and go home hahhahahah

      Town isnt restricted as such… but police are just “overzealoulsy” enforcing COVID regulations like making sure people are social distancing and wearing masks (even if one lowers mask to drink water… I should get a straw next time)

      News is soooo depressing I think I saw headlines that they arrested that popular Wine guy…

      its really hot right now too like what is this?


      1. Hahaha am just glad you back here to update us on what’s happening coz clearly your low key our newsletter from outta there….

        Guess I want to know how the African police is trained they must have some manual passed over that they abide by because they sound the same same

        Liked by 1 person

    1. defintely not friendly… ironically I was looking at a banner that said Victim Friendly Unit and yeah… I dont think they are very friendly at all no wonder people dont report some things…

      Well they ate like kings hahahahaha


  6. I am so sorry for your ordeal, it sounds down right awful. What would have happened if you did not have the cash, would they keep you over night? I am glad you are out hopefully still covid-19 free. You have a way of writing that makes everything seem so much better than what it actually is. Keep writing and keep safe we still need you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. hahahaha if you didnt have the cash for the fine they would keep you overnight
      I didnt have it but I made friends with someone who had a bit of extra bonds and transferred Ecocash in exchange for Bond Notes


  7. I’m so glad to hear you are okay. The police really like to do the most..even when it’s not necessary.
    Sorry you went through that.

    As for those who ate the fish? I wouldn’t want to be them.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well it least it wasnt too hectic and I can laugh about now but still not cool and I think some people even end up being detained overnight when they cant pay the fine

      Hahahaha maybe they will catch another…. there’s plenty of fish in the sea


  8. I think our police can really be petty at time, if not most of the times. Imagine getting arrested for removing your mask to drink water. I’ve heard a number of people who have fallen victim to this and had to pay a special tip to be let go. Sorry for the experience and thanks for the mention.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am fairly sure one officer made reference to the “special tip” to let me go asking me how much I had but silly me thought hey I will just pay my fine since i didn’t have any small notes and I doubt i would have gotten change if i gave him a $20🤣
      But after the experience I will definitely and very quickly offer a tip 😁 they make us to become lawless

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Its even that I wasnt wearing themask, I had lowered it so I could drink water…
      A fellow arrestee told me they got nabbed while answering a phone and another was getting out of their car and got arrested whle still locking car door…. I think the police a little overzealous in carrying out their duties and then this thing of packing everyone into the station, yeah wont be surprised if the police station is the next COVID Hotspot… Its almost like they just want to seem busy (well they did get a pay increment which is why the other civil servants are complaining that they want a similar pay increment)


      Liked by 1 person

  9. The way Police conduct themselves and their business is only a sign of their own frustrations and bitterness simmering underneath their perfectly pressed uniforms. Innocent people are always an outlet of their ill-emotions against powers that be!

    Next time try drinking water through your properly worn mask! What a world!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. yep I think I am getting a water bottle with a straw and a face mask with a straw opening hahahahaha

      Also you are right its like the police take out their frustrations on us unsuspecting civilians… unless of course they really are just brutes in uniforms, weapons that mindlessly follow orders



  10. I laughed because of the way you wrote it, but in the moment it probably wasn’t funny for you. I’m sorry you had to go through that. Maybe the police have quotas like the traffic police in SA – they have quotas to catch traffic offenders but it is about making money. It’s been hottish here in Joburg, still short-sleeve weather with a bit of wind today. The cats are still sleeping outside so the weather is still ok LOL.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha it certainly wasn’t funny at the time but it makes for a funny story….

      I am fairly sure they have some quota they are chasing besides, now that I think about it, what happens to the money people pay as fine 🤣🤣

      It’s been rather hottish too felt almost like would rain the other day but didn’t ….

      Liked by 1 person

  11. One of many African stories that make my eyes water, then make me laugh.

    So… madam officer checked on you? B isn’t telling the whole story.

    Liked by 1 person

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