Of Serving Karma And Hidden Beef

I don’t understand wings, chicken wings, buffalo wings, hot wings, spicy wings… I am a breast and thighs man, and we are talking chicken, just so we are on the same plate.

Sweet and spicy wings
Sweet and Spicy chicken wings

So chicken wings… If you can explain them to me, I would greatly appreciate it. I think they are a scam.

I went to a mission boarding, it was the worst of times and it was hardly ever the best of times and the food, well, at least it provided sustenance. The meal of the week was the Thursday lunch which was rice and chicken and the Sunday Special which again was rice and chicken but with a banana as dessert, good times.

beaton
Young B.

The second least offensive piece of meat you could be served was the chicken wing, people would joke that wakwidzwa ndege meaningyou had been boarded into a planebecause wing. I still don’t like wings, the trauma lies deep. The most offensive piece, which was the equivalent of dropping a bomb, literally known as kubhombwa which meant you been bombed, was being given, what was known as mulaso, the chicken ass…

Image

The order of dishing out the food rotated daily so you would eventually get your turn to serve food to your table mates, sometimes it was just easier to dish the offensive part into your plate to avoid drama and an unending feud.

When I as in the first form, we sat in groups of 8 per table and there was a Table Leader who was responsible for… stuff, I don’t even know what the reason of having one was except that they got the choicest piece of meat and in the mixed cabbage and beef stew (jovo) that was the supper dish everyday, they got meat, the meat pieces were usually odd numbered so not everyone got..

In the Second Form, I was a Dorm Prefect which automatically made me a Table Leader.. fun times, except when it wasn’t fun because you would get punished for the transgressions of your wards… but that’s a story for another day. Anyway, back to the first form, this one day, I got a plate with enough pieces of meat for everyone at our table to get a piece, hidden beneath the vegetables…

Beef and Cabbage Stir Fry
It looked nothing like this beef and cabbage stir fry by BudgetBytes

The guy who had been dishing had tried to scam everyone of their meat and somehow I ended up with his plate, it was hilarious watching him turn over and over the contents of his plate trying to figure out where his meat had gone; he even eyed everyone else’s plates suspiciously trying to understand what had happened.

I pretended not to notice and calmly ate my sadza and cabbage and hidden meat…

You see in the afternoon he had bombed my plate with the mulaso, karma works in mysterious ways, you get served what you deserve.

Welcome to karma cafe
the are no menus here you'll get served what you deserved

~B

So next time you think of scamming someone remember:

Karma

34 Comments

  1. This reminds me of some old lady back at the village. She would say, “waita zvakanaka, wazviitira. Waita zvakaipa, wazviitira.” That’s how I first understood karma

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Growing up in South America the wings were always my absolut favorite part. They had more flavor to them and there were all sort of little crunchy bits that I coule suck and chew on. Sure, I admit I was kind of a gross kid. Maybe I still am.
    But anyway, when I moved to the Netherlands my love for chicken wings was over quickly. Chickens here are just ginormous breasts on legs. The wings have evolved into tiny, scrawny twigs that make no sense at all.
    It made me sad in many ways (starting with the realization of what that meant for the actual chicken) but when I have a choice, I still go for a bit of chicken with some bone in them, like a thigh or drumstick.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Epi!!!!

      As one who grew up in a family were chewing bones and suck out the spongy stuff inside was totally normal I absolutely relate and I hate dining out because people look at funny when you set down your fork and knife and pick up the bone and start crunching so I instead I request for a takeaway bag to deal with in leisure…

      A million dollar restaurant idea…. one with private booths where you can go to eat your bones in private 😁😁😁.
      Oh no, what do they do to the poor chickens in the Netherlands ??

      Heeey I prefer my meat with bone too not just the steak without thinking about it I would probably pick a drumstick from a platter full of chicken pieces and it’s easy to hold too

      ~B

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Ah, or what about a restaurant where cracking cartilage and sucking marrow is ok! In fact, a restaurant without cutlery all together sounds awesome, not in the least for the kitchen crew.

        Oh my mind is going crazy thinking of all the possible names for such a place.

        😂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. The possibilities!!!!
        I am all for no cutlery getting up close and personal with your food…
        Hmmm Close Encounters feel, taste and experience your food

        ~B

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha and we kept and killed the chickens ourselves too 😁

      If the chicken apocalypse ever happens you should stick with me I am a certified chicken killer
      ~B

      Like

      1. Hmmm I have no idea but to work it all the form one boys had to each kill 3 chickens weekly.. guessing the were about 100 that would tentatively place it at about 300 chickens

        Like

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