Of Lemons Monologue: The Fall Of The House Of Usher

Watching The Fall Of The House Of Usher Episode 3 and had to pause and capture this monologue by Roderick Usher about what you do when life gives you lemons:

Roderick Usher Fall Of The House Of Usher
Bruce Greenwood as Roderick Usher Netflix © 2023
When life hands you lemons, make lemonade?
No.
First you roll out a multi-media campaign to convince people lemons are incredibly scarce, which only works if you stockpile lemons, control the supply, then a media blitz.
Lemon is the only way to say “I love you,” the must-have accessory for engagements or anniversaries.
Roses are out, lemons are in.
Billboards that say she won’t have sex with you unless you got lemons.
You cut De Beers in on it. Limited edition lemon bracelets, yellow diamonds called lemon drops. You get Apple to call their new operating system OS-Lemón. A little accent over the “o.”
You charge 40% more for organic lemons, 50% more for conflict-free lemons.
You pack the Capitol with lemon lobbyists, you get a Kardashian to suck a lemon wedge in a leaked sex tape. Timotheé Chalamet wears lemon shoes at Cannes.
Get a hashtag campaign. Something isn’t “cool” or “tight” or “awesome,” no, it’s “lemon.” “Did you see that movie? Did you see that concert? It was effing lemon.”
Billie Eilish, “OMG, hashtag… lemon.” 
You get Dr. Oz to recommend four lemons a day and a lemon suppository supplement to get rid of toxins ‘cause there’s nothing scarier than toxins.
Then you patent the seeds. You write a line of genetic code that makes the lemons look just a little more like tits… and you get a gene patent for the tit-lemon DNA sequence, you cross-pollinate… you get those seeds circulating in the wild, and then you sue the farmer for copyright infringement when that genetic code shows up on their land.
Sit back, rake in the millions, and then, when you’re done, and you’ve sold your lem-pire for a few billion dollars, then, and only then, you make some f****ng lemonade.

What do you make of this monologue?

Responses to “Of Lemons Monologue: The Fall Of The House Of Usher”

  1. Lyrics Of Life avatar

    Just started episode one…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Beaton avatar

      A few minutes into watching I found the storytelling gripping its quite a riveting watch with a tad of spookiness hahaha

      ~B

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Lyrics Of Life avatar

        Was hesitant to watch it thinking it’s about the artist but so far loving the story as well

        Like

  2. Bookstooge avatar

    Just the kind of person we all want to lynch….

    Like

  3. Matt avatar

    Sounds like the American Dream

    Like

  4. Of The Fall Of The House Of Usher – Becoming The Muse avatar

    […] interesting insight into what it means to be rich beyond material wealth and is an allegory of the corrupting nature of capitalism and that someone all aways picks up the tab for the […]

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Keto Queen Recipes avatar

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  6. Philosopher Muse avatar

    What do I make of this monologue!? As a piece of prose it rocks and from an economic perspective it rolls. The Fall of the House of Usher series speaks volumes.

    What did you enjoy the most about the final episode?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Beaton avatar

      What I loved best about the final episode is firstly how it tied up everything that had been happening in the Faustian-like tale…. and of course that one always pays the price.

      ~B

      Liked by 1 person

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