Becoming The Muse

Trigger Warning: Rape, Abuse, Mental Health, Self Harm and Suicide

At What Age Does My Body Belong To Me

At What Age Does My Body Belong To Me is a debut memoir by Amanda Tayte-Tait Marufu officially released 26 January 26, 2021 and is available to order: Here

I had the honour of reading a pre-release version in exchange for an honest review.

At What Age Does My Body Belong To Me was birthed from pondering on the existential question at what age does my body belong to me? Children belong to their parents until they are 18 or 21 but for girls and women, probably till they get married and then they become their husband’s…..

When your body does not really belong to you?

At What Age Does My Body Belong To Me is a raw and gritty read about rage, pain and healing, abuse, a society that forces people to conform, identity and sexuality. Its one person’s story and also the stories of others who have survived and the cycle of broken people who hurt others.

The book is in two parts and opens with a suicide letter which implies that this is not the first time but it will be the last time…. The first part of the book describes a turbulent childhood with abuse, teen dating, self hate leading upto to suicide. The second part is about life after suicide, therapy, sexuality and coming to terms with whom one becomes.

Amanda is personified in the character of Mia and in this candid narrative exposes much about society and offers an insight into the making of a feminist. If you are wondering why they seem so angry, read this book and how would you not be angry too, if this was your story and once you had found your voice you would use it.

The writing style is narrative like a diary but at times switches to a sort of infomercial with stats and details on abuse, rape and mental health. The transition can get a bit jarring, switching from something that reads like a personal journal to an awareness pamphlet and then back to the journal, as if the author pulls back from taking us to the deep end by returning to a world of cold hard facts and figures.

It’s a difficult and triggering book to read but its necessary, when I closed the last page I wanted to find Amanda and say, “I am sorry, I’m sorry I don’t know what age your body belongs to you, but it should always be yours.“